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You Cannot "Un-say" What Has Already Been Said

So, I shared my house arrest/ankle bracelet secret with someone from AA today and it went better than I had planned. I've chosen to keep that secret to avoid the prejudgment and aggravation all together. They say in AA we're supposed to leave our judgment at the door, but I don't think everyone follows that rule. Truth is, I sometimes don't. I'm human, it happens! Everyone I've met in AA has been so kind and supportive, and I'd like to keep it that way!
    Lately I've been socializing with two of the younger men after meetings. Usually we talk about random things like the weather and so forth, but today I found myself talking to them about everything. Finally one of them said "So, uh, what's your story? Did you drink every day? You just don't really seem...... like an alcoholic".  I considered saying I was an alcoholic and left it at that, but without realizing it, I was already sharing my story.
      the two boys were completely stunned and next thing I knew they were lifting up my pant legs. They asked me all about my "accessories" and seemed to be interested in my situation. Come to find out, they had both been familiar with the law. One of them was currently "on the run". It felt good to release all the bottled up emotions I had acquired. To my surprise, they didn't judge me. I later received individual text messages sharing their inspiration and hope. They both expressed their admiration of my strength and that they would keep me in their prayers. One of the guys said my story really helped him to stay sober.
I'm still not ready to share my experience with everyone, but it felt refreshing to share with someone. One of my closest friends in the program knows I am in some kind of "trouble", but he doesn't know anything about it. He doesn't care to know, because he appreciates the friendship we've developed. He believes "Once you tell someone something, you cannot untell them. We can try our best not to judge one another, but we're human and it happens."
     Maybe I'll get up and share my personal experience at a meeting, but for now I'm happy keeping it to myself. This is all still very new to me, and I'm not sure I'm ready to open up to just anyone. I'm still figuring out how to be comfortable with my new circumstances, I do not need the poor judgment from others interfering with my happiness.

Sincerely,

Allison


"Before you start to judge me, step into my shoes and walk the life I'm living and if you get as far as I am, just maybe you will see how strong I really am". - Unknown

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